So what's a couple to do? Just resign yourself to not dating until the kids are able to stay alone and put themselves to bed? Pull a "Good Dog Carl" and hope no one calls CPS? Our solution is an early bedtime routine. It is rare that our boys aren't in bed (for good) at 7:30. This gives us several hours each evening to be together and spend time with just the two of us. We have been fortunate to have good sleepers and we have worked to help them fall asleep on their own following our nightly routine. It's simple, but it works for us.
The key is making sure that you are intentional about spending quality time together. It doesn't help to put the kids in bed at a decent hour if you are only going to retire to your own parts of the house until 10 pm. Some nights we watch television together. Wednesday nights we love to make popcorn (on the stove, with real butter and salt and parmesan cheese) and watch LOST. It's our favorite and one of the few shows we watch live and not from our DVR. Other nights we read together in bed or watch a movie. On special occasions, like Valentine's Day, we even wait and have a late dinner that's a bit more romantic than dining with the boys. There are some evenings when we both have things to do on our own but most nights we spend those couple of hours together.
We certainly enjoy an evening all to ourselves with a sitter watching the boys. We've been fortunate to find some really great ones everywhere that we've lived. But it's important to spend quality time together more than just once or twice a month. I want to encourage you to be intentional with your spouse this week after the kids are in bed. Pick a show on television to watch together. Play a game. Watch a movie you think they will enjoy. And if you can't come up with anything else, just make it "Naked Thursday" and I'm sure you'll find some way to kill the time.
As I read you post, I just kept thinking "bible study Thursday", not sure if you remember...regardless, thank you for the encouragement. I get so busy preparing for the next day once the kids are in bed that many nights I forget my hubby is home. Although, I have to say, last night, he surprised me with Nights in Rodanthe from Red Box and a candy bar from 7-11. A Monday date, how refreshing!
ReplyDeleteWe get our two in bed early too! Having that time together makes a big difference!
ReplyDeleteYou're pretty funny! :)Dietrich isn't on a consistant schedule yet so some nights he's in bed at 8 and some he's in bed at 11. Maybe this will work itself out soon! We do need to do a better job of spending that evening time together though. Now I work on quilting or something and Ben plays games on the computer or does some research. Maybe we can be more intentional tonight!
ReplyDeleteMy kids loved the Carl books! I haven't thought of those in years. :)
ReplyDeleteI'm so glad we are not the only ones who do this. After putting the children to bed, we come downstairs for our nightly devotion together, then we choose something to do, usually something together. One person gets to choose their top 3 ideas for the night and the other gets to choose one of them for the nights activities.
ReplyDeleteYup, we've been putting our little guy to bed at about 7-7:30 every night since he was 3 months old. It is so nice to have all that time to yourselves. When people ask when our DS goes to bed they are always so shocked at how "early" it is. Seriously? I remember going to bed early as a kid and I could hear the tv or stereo downstairs if I snuck to the top of the stairway lol! Great post =)
ReplyDeleteWe're all about early bedtimes with our 3 little people, too!
ReplyDeleteAs your father, I remember those early bedtimes for you and your brother. You might not have been cool, but you were certainly sneaky...remember watching Magnum P.I. from the hallway when you were supposed to be in bed??? IT will be interesting to see how Luke and Mark handle "early bedtime" when they are old enough to realize they are missing something!!!
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